Learned helplessness happens when we don’t believe we have the ability to change our world & that external forces are against us. If that’s true, we wouldn’t bother to learn or practice anything. We can change our destination, but sometimes we have to turn the corner to meet the success that awaits those who persist.
We need to help our youth athletes develop and use the skill they have, but it means nothing unless we help them know how to use the skill. If we don’t help them develop that side of their game they will forever be building on less than ideal foundations. This is true in sport and life.
If we want to see development, praising a kid for being fast or for looking flashy but losing the ball 9 times out of 10 isn’t going to help. We need to reward the new behaviours, the growth, and the understanding of teamwork.
There is a fine line in superstition. It has to be believed for it to work, but it can’t be given the full power of determining victory or defeat or there is no point practicing. For Skinner’s pigeon the superstition worked, but only when it worked a little harder, went a little further, and did just a little more that it did last time.
Life comes at us fast and there are many moving parts. Sometimes we can’t factor everything in and things go wrong. As long as we are aware things may go wrong, we won’t get rattled when we have to change our path a little. Stay flexible and open to reevaluation.
If you are struggling today be on the lookout for the one person who encourages you and won’t let you fail. If you are in a position where you see someone in need, help them. You may be that one person who helps them change their life and become something more than they ever thought they could be.
Coaches create lifelong memories. Our kids today are playing games they will remember for the rest of their lives, and I hope that when it comes to my son he is able to remember the games he gave everything, when he tried new things that came off, and that the score doesn’t take away the feeling of achievement if it’s a game the team lost.
It takes a relentless and ruthless mentality to be successful, the kind of mindset that takes teams like Stevenage F.C. from being almost relegated from the Conference in 2004 to being in League One seven years later. And to go on record – I love Marmite
In sport, a “us vs them” mentality is an amazing way to fire up your team and create confidence that everyone is fighting for the same cause. It’s a basic social identity concept, it works well in sport. In society, too much of it is, well, how we end up with the division we are seeing now.
The world is a very divided, and divisive place. Don’t be distracted, keep your focus on your goals and seek to achieve great things. If people are able to hate Mother Teresa, the rest of us are guaranteed to pick up a nemesis along the way, don’t let them steal your vision.
We have choices when we develop people, whether it is kids, soccer players, team members, employees, or anyone. We can give them the goals and the tools and guide their process or we can tell them how to complete the job. One of these is development and growth, the other is obedience to a system.
If we stick to formulas and what has been done before we will only see the results we have seen before. If we allow room for creativity, accept mistakes, and learn from the moments that didn’t go well we will create an environment of growth, and that is how success becomes part of the DNA.